Good day to anyone tuning in. This is your host Quua’Ez Mzaqera, bringing Raging Tides through the airwaves to your home!
Right now, it’s a sunny 28 degrees across Mendell City.
The traffic right now, for those of you on your commute is void-awful. If it were me, friends, I would avoid the interstate.
Now, to the news…
Yet another disappearance has been reported in Severson City, this time a 200-year-old Skrell, Vol’Xu Weibaq. 
Our reporter was able to get an interview with a purported witness.
Let’s see what they have to say.
(brief interlude music)
/Loud warbling with a monotone Ceti Basic translation overlaid on it is heard from the radio./
/”I’m telling you! It’s Ximi No'Tails! He’s real!”/
“Can you tell us who this /Ximi No’Tails/ is?”
“They’ve been going around, killing people, and stealing their headtails! They lost their own because some xeno stole their tails!”
“If the Mendell Police actually gave a shit about this district, maybe we wouldn’t have a serial headtail thief running around!”
“Alright. Do you have any physical evidence of this… “Ximi No’Tails?”
“No, he’s like a ghost! Maybe an ex-Tup, but just wait and see! A body will turn up eventually. And guess what? No headtails. This place is lawless- how the hell can I live like this?!”
“Alright. We’re going to have to end the interview here. Raging Tides thank you for your time.”
[RANDOMNOTE]/interlude music/[RANDOMNOTE]
Are you tired of the same old Belle Cote vacation? 
Do you miss home?
 Come to Qerr’Malic, ranked the top vacation destination in the Nralakk Federation for 150 years
in a row. 
Some restrictions may apply. Vacation packages are only available for citizens with a social compatibility index of 5.2 or above.
(interlude music)
Now for some entertainment updates.
In a surprise turn of events, Weshi Beshi has announced a new album.
Originally, they announced a complete stop to their music career to focus on more academic pursuits.
However, our inside sources in the Federation Idol scene have received a scoop:
It appears Weshi Beshi doesn’t have the same talent for science as they do for the performing arts.
According to our source, Weshi was caught plagiarizing another scientist’s work on warp theory.
To cover this up, they paid millions of squlips to PR agencies to completely remove any mention of this off the extranet.
So the next time you listen to Weshi, think if their public image is true, or a carefully cultivated falsehood.
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Are you TIRED of having a BORING gaming experience?
Tired of these unrealistic Heroes of Tau Ceti shooter games?
Come on down to Glzaq’s VR arcade! 
We have full-on vaurca VR specialists working on this shit.
Is it so real if you die in the game? You might die in real life.
Packages start at one hundred credits.
So go ahead, and upgrade your gaming experience to the real deal.
[RANDOMNOTE]/brief interlude music/[RANDOMNOTE]
Now, for some news from our home, the Federation.
We’ll be discussing an important topic: returning home, where Skrell belongs.
The truth is that every Skrell is a citizen, and the Federation values everyone as their own.
Even dissidents who fled the Federation in the cowardly action that was the Weibii “exodus” will be welcomed back home.
After a short session of completely safe, scientifically backed rehabilitation processes, you will feel like a brand-new Skrell.
A Skrell that is ready to serve for the greater good of our species, in the Federation.
To explore more information about the Nralakk citizenship process, visit the extranet website at nralakkfed/citizenship.xt.
Remember, the Federation is your friend.
[RANDOMNOTE]/brief interlude music/[RANDOMNOTE] 
Now for some nationwide news. 
The Biesellite election cycle is in full swing, and it appears this candidate pool is the most diverse we’ve ever seen.
We’re going to switch to our field reporter, Qaz Zareq.
[RANDOMNOTE]/brief static/[RANDOMNOTE]
“Hi, Quua! This is Qaz on the streets of Mendell City, and I’m /right/ in the heart of District 1.”
“This place is the beating heart of Mendell, and I have a human with me- what is your name, human?”
“Joshua. I work for NT.”
“So, Joshua of NanoTrasen, who do you plan to vote for in the elections?”
“Well, you know, it’s such a hard answer. Sure, I do want more pay. And less rent. And not have to hear about another Peacekeeper Mandate crisis. Originally, I thought I was going to vote for Dorn, again, but after all the stuff that’s happened? I’m not sure yet. Maybe that Cetian Conservative? I forgot his name.”
“Alright, Joshua.. Does that mean you’re disappointed in the way Dorn’s running things?”
“No, not really. I think he did his job while he was in office, but now it’s time for change, you know? Everyone’s so tired of him, it feels like. I always hear people complaining about, /Oh, Dorn did that, or did you hear Dorn hiked up taxes?/ at the watercooler, and I think just every Biesellite’s just grown weary of him. It’s definitely time for change.”
“Thank you, Joshua. I am sure there are many Biesellites out there who feel the same way, and this is likely going to be a fairly intriguing election cycle.”
[RANDOMNOTE]/Brief Static/[RANDOMNOTE]
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[RANDOMNOTE]/brief static/[RANDOMNOTE]
Now, we’re going to get to our fact-checking segment
Many Skrell around the Starlight Zone have been discussing what’s called a “drylist.” 
But what is this “drylist?” Is it a nasty rumor or a hidden truth?
According to our research on online Starlight Zone forums, the drylist appears to be a so-called list of names that the Federation is actively monitoring.
After extensive research by the Raging Tides team, we have ruled this: FALSE.
There is no evidence that the Federation monitors deviant non-citizens.
The forums claim outdated sources and deviant, untrustworthy Skrell as sources, meaning that the claim holds no water.
Always be sure to properly check your sources for claims that disrupt social harmony, such as the so-called “drylist” conspiracy theory.
[RANDOMNOTE]/interlude music/[RANDOMNOTE]
Now for some local news, right here in the Starlight Zone.
Mendell City Police have once again hit a wall in the investigation into the Quix-Collective, an organized crime group in the Zone.
A supposed informant for the group who was planning to speak to detectives mysteriously disappeared after they first got into contact with the police department.
A search for the informant, who name remains confidential continues by the police department.
This has been the second disappearance in connection to the Quix-Collective, with Mendell City Police Department Detective Xoriq Mzaq stating,
“We will not stop to find this criminal poisoning District 8.” 
“Quix likely has contacts inside the police department and internal investigations are being done to determine if we leak within our investigations department.”
“I recommend all citizens avoid any contact with Quix or the organised crime group they run at all costs.”
[RANDOMNOTE]/interlude music/[RANDOMNOTE]
That concludes our show for the day.
Mendell, stay safe and moisturized!
