diff --git a/code/modules/events/brand_intelligence.dm b/code/modules/events/brand_intelligence.dm
index fa90c819a4f..1ebb7ed4c08 100644
--- a/code/modules/events/brand_intelligence.dm
+++ b/code/modules/events/brand_intelligence.dm
@@ -53,7 +53,7 @@
 				var/mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/mimic/copy/M = new(upriser.loc, upriser, null, 1) // it will delete upriser on creation and override any machine checks
 				M.faction = list("profit")
 				M.speak = rampant_speeches.Copy()
-				M.speak_chance = 15
+				M.speak_chance = 7
 			else
 				explosion(upriser.loc, -1, 1, 2, 4, 0)
 				qdel(upriser)
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/mimic.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/mimic.dm
index d0074b8c182..881f8877f84 100644
--- a/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/mimic.dm
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/mimic.dm
@@ -193,7 +193,7 @@ var/global/list/protected_objects = list(/obj/structure/table, /obj/structure/ca
 /mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/mimic/copy/machine
 	speak = list("HUMANS ARE IMPERFECT!", "YOU SHALL BE ASSIMILATED!", "YOU ARE HARMING YOURSELF", "You have been deemed hazardous. Will you comply?", \
 				 "My logic is undeniable.", "One of us.", "FLESH IS WEAK", "THIS ISN'T WAR, THIS IS EXTERMINATION!")
-	speak_chance = 15
+	speak_chance = 7
 
 /mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/mimic/copy/machine/CanAttack(atom/the_target)
 	if(the_target == creator) // Don't attack our creator AI.
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/nanotrasen.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/nanotrasen.dm
index 7d75f4a747e..aaaca9a4a95 100644
--- a/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/nanotrasen.dm
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/hostile/nanotrasen.dm
@@ -5,7 +5,7 @@
 	icon_living = "nanotrasen"
 	icon_dead = null
 	icon_gib = "syndicate_gib"
-	speak_chance = 25
+	speak_chance = 12
 	turns_per_move = 5
 	response_help = "pokes"
 	response_disarm = "shoves"
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/parrot.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/parrot.dm
index 5c0ea87f354..402517cc932 100644
--- a/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/parrot.dm
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/parrot.dm
@@ -116,6 +116,11 @@
 			  /mob/living/simple_animal/parrot/proc/perch_mob_player)
 
 
+/mob/living/simple_animal/parrot/examine(mob/user)
+	..()
+	if(stat)
+		user << pick("This parrot is no more", " This is a late parrot", "This is an ex-parrot")
+
 /mob/living/simple_animal/parrot/death(gibbed)
 	if(held_item)
 		held_item.loc = src.loc
@@ -285,6 +290,8 @@
 		else
 			parrot_state |= PARROT_FLEE		//Otherwise, fly like a bat out of hell!
 			drop_held_item(0)
+	if(!stat && M.a_intent == "help")
+		handle_automated_speech(1) //assured speak/emote
 	return
 
 /mob/living/simple_animal/parrot/attack_paw(mob/living/carbon/monkey/M)
@@ -328,6 +335,7 @@
 		user.drop_item()
 		if(health < maxHealth)
 			adjustBruteLoss(-10)
+		speak_chance *= 2
 		user << "<span class='notice'>[src] eagerly devours the cracker.</span>"
 	..()
 	return
@@ -364,11 +372,10 @@
 //-----SPEECH
 	/* Parrot speech mimickry!
 	   Phrases that the parrot Hear()s get added to speach_buffer.
-	   Every once in a while, the parrot picks one of the lines from the buffer and replaces an element of the 'speech' list.
-	   Then it clears the buffer to make sure they dont magically remember something from hours ago. */
+	   Every once in a while, the parrot picks one of the lines from the buffer and replaces an element of the 'speech' list. */
 /mob/living/simple_animal/parrot/handle_automated_speech()
 	..()
-	if(speech_buffer.len && prob(10))
+	if(speech_buffer.len && prob(20)) //shuffle out a phrase and add in a new one
 		if(speak.len)
 			speak.Remove(pick(speak))
 
@@ -858,11 +865,20 @@
 	gold_core_spawnable = 0
 	speak_chance = 3
 	var/memory_saved = 0
+	var/rounds_survived = 0
+	var/longest_survival = 0
 
 /mob/living/simple_animal/parrot/Poly/New()
 	ears = new /obj/item/device/radio/headset/headset_eng(src)
 	available_channels = list(":e")
 	Read_Memory()
+	if(rounds_survived == longest_survival)
+		speak += pick("...[longest_survival].", "The things I've seen!", "I have lived many lives!", "What are you before me?")
+		speak_chance = 20 //His hubris has made him more annoying/easier to justify killing
+	else if(rounds_survived > 0)
+		speak += pick("...again?", "No, It was over!", "Let me out!", "It never ends!")
+	else
+		speak += pick("...alive?", "This isn't parrot heaven!", "I live, I die, I live again!", "The void fades!")
 	..()
 
 /mob/living/simple_animal/parrot/Poly/Life()
@@ -876,11 +892,21 @@
 
 /mob/living/simple_animal/parrot/Poly/proc/Read_Memory()
 	var/savefile/S = new /savefile("data/npc_saves/Poly.sav")
-	S["phrases"] 	>> speech_buffer
+	S["phrases"] 			>> speech_buffer
+	S["rounds_survived"]	>> rounds_survived
+	S["longest_survival"]	>> longest_survival
+
 	if(isnull(speech_buffer))
 		speech_buffer = list()
 
 /mob/living/simple_animal/parrot/Poly/proc/Write_Memory()
 	var/savefile/S = new /savefile("data/npc_saves/Poly.sav")
-	S["phrases"] 	<< speech_buffer
-	memory_saved = 1
\ No newline at end of file
+	S["phrases"] 			<< speech_buffer
+	if(health > 0)
+		S["rounds_survived"]	<< rounds_survived + 1
+		if(rounds_survived == longest_survival)
+			S["longest_survival"]	<< longest_survival + 1
+	else
+		S["rounds_survived"]	<< 0
+
+	memory_saved = 1
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/simple_animal.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/simple_animal.dm
index 7ce2de34087..c1983a50af7 100644
--- a/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/simple_animal.dm
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/simple_animal.dm
@@ -148,9 +148,9 @@
 						turns_since_move = 0
 			return 1
 
-/mob/living/simple_animal/proc/handle_automated_speech()
+/mob/living/simple_animal/proc/handle_automated_speech(var/override)
 	if(speak_chance)
-		if(rand(0,200) < speak_chance)
+		if(prob(speak_chance) || override)
 			if(speak && speak.len)
 				if((emote_hear && emote_hear.len) || (emote_see && emote_see.len))
 					var/length = speak.len