diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/animals/sculpture.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/animals/sculpture.dm
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..1acf703a89
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/simple_animal/animals/sculpture.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,276 @@
+//sculpture
+//SCP-173, nothing more need be said
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture
+	name = "\improper sculpture"
+	desc = "It's some kind of hastily-painted human-size stone sculpture. Just looking at it makes you feel nervous."
+	icon_state = "sculpture"
+	icon_living = "sculpture"
+	icon_dead = "sculpture"
+	emote_hear = list("makes a faint scraping sound")
+	emote_see = list("twitches slightly", "shivers")
+	response_help  = "touches the"
+	response_disarm = "pushes the"
+	response_harm   = "hits the"
+	see_in_dark = 8 //Needs to see in darkness to snap in darkness
+	pass_flags = PASSTABLE
+	var/response_snap = "snapped the neck of" //Past tense because it "happened before you could see it"
+	var/response_snap_target = "In the blink of an eye, something grabs you and snaps your neck!"
+	var/snap_sound = list('sound/scp/firstpersonsnap.ogg','sound/scp/firstpersonsnap2.ogg','sound/scp/firstpersonsnap3.ogg')
+	var/scare_sound = list('sound/scp/scare1.ogg','sound/scp/scare2.ogg','sound/scp/scare3.ogg','sound/scp/scare4.ogg')	//Boo
+	var/hibernate = 0 //Disables SCP until toggled back to 0
+	var/scare_played = 0 //Did we rape everyone's ears yet ?
+	var/obj/machinery/atmospherics/unary/vent_pump/entry_vent //Graciously stolen from spider code
+
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/Life()
+
+	//If we are hibernating, just don't do anything
+	if(hibernate)
+		return
+
+	if(!check_los())
+		return
+
+	//See if we're able to strangle anyone
+	for(var/mob/living/carbon/M in get_turf(src))
+		if(M.stat == CONSCIOUS && check_los())
+			snap_neck(M)
+			break
+
+	//Find out what mobs we can see for targetting purposes
+	var/list/conscious = list()
+	for(var/mob/living/carbon/H in view(7, src))
+		if(H.stat == CONSCIOUS) //He's up and running
+			conscious.Add(H)
+
+	//Pick the nearest valid conscious target
+	var/mob/living/carbon/target
+	for(var/mob/living/carbon/H in conscious)
+		if(!target || get_dist(src, H) < get_dist(src, target))
+			target = H
+
+	if(target)
+		handle_target(target)
+	else
+		handle_idle()
+
+
+//Check if any mob can see SPC-173
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/proc/check_los()
+
+	var/observed = 0
+
+	//Humans can observe SCP-173. If a single human observes him, he's observed for everyone
+	//Note that humans have a 180 degrees field of vision for the purposes of this proc
+	for(var/mob/living/carbon/H in viewers(src, null))
+		if(H.stat)
+			continue
+		var/x_diff = H.x - src.x
+		var/y_diff = H.y - src.y
+		if(y_diff != 0) //If we are not on the same vertical plane (up/down), mob is either above or below src
+			if(y_diff < 0 && H.dir == NORTH) //Mob is below src and looking up
+				observed = 1
+				break
+			else if(y_diff > 0 && H.dir == SOUTH) //Mob is above src and looking down
+				observed = 1
+				break
+		if(x_diff != 0) //If we are not on the same horizontal plane (left/right), mob is either left or right of src
+			if(x_diff < 0 && H.dir == EAST) //Mob is left of src and looking right
+				observed = 1
+				break
+			else if(x_diff > 0 && H.dir == WEST) //Mob is right of src and looking left
+				observed = 1
+				break
+
+	if(observed) //Is someone looking at us, given that they can see us ?
+		return 0 //Try again when we get a chance
+	return 1 //Success, let's move
+
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/proc/handle_target(var/mob/living/carbon/target)
+
+	if(!target) //Sanity
+		return
+
+	if(!check_los())
+		return
+
+	var/turf/target_turf
+
+	//Send the warning that SPC is homing in
+	target_turf = get_turf(target)
+	if(!scare_played) //Let's minimize the spam
+		playsound(get_turf(src), pick(scare_sound), 50, 1)
+		scare_played = 1
+		spawn(50)
+			scare_played = 0
+
+	//Rampage along a path to get to them, in the blink of an eye
+	var/turf/next_turf = get_step_towards(src, target)
+	var/num_turfs = get_dist(src,target)
+	spawn()
+		while(get_turf(src) != target_turf && num_turfs > 0)
+			if(!check_los()) //Something is looking at us now
+				break
+			if(!next_turf.CanPass(src, next_turf)) //We can't pass through our planned path
+				break
+			for(var/obj/structure/table/O in next_turf)
+				O.ex_act(1)
+				sleep(5)
+			for(var/obj/structure/closet/C in next_turf)
+				C.ex_act(1)
+				sleep(5)
+			for(var/obj/structure/grille/G in next_turf)
+				G.ex_act(1)
+				sleep(5)
+			for(var/obj/machinery/door/airlock/A in next_turf)
+				if(A.welded || A.locked) //Snowflakey code to take in account bolts and welding
+					break
+				A.open()
+				sleep(5)
+			for(var/obj/machinery/door/D in next_turf)
+				D.open()
+				sleep(5)
+			if(!next_turf.CanPass(src, next_turf)) //Once we cleared everything we could, check one last time if we can pass
+				break
+			forceMove(next_turf)
+			dir = get_dir(src, target)
+			next_turf = get_step(src, get_dir(next_turf,target))
+			num_turfs--
+
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/proc/handle_idle()
+
+	if(!check_los())
+		return
+
+	//If we're not strangling anyone, take a stroll
+	if(prob(25)) //1 in 4 chance of checking out something new
+		var/list/turfs = new/list()
+		for(var/turf/T in view(7, src))
+			if(!istype(T, /turf/simulated/floor))
+				continue
+			turfs += T
+		var/turf/target_turf = safepick(turfs)
+		if(!target_turf)
+			return
+		//Move to our new resting point with celerity
+		var/turf/next_turf = get_step_towards(src, target_turf)
+		var/num_turfs = get_dist(src, target_turf)
+		spawn()
+			while(get_turf(src) != target_turf && num_turfs > 0)
+				if(!check_los()) //Something is looking at us now
+					break
+				if(!next_turf.CanPass(src, next_turf)) //We can't pass through our planned path
+					break
+				for(var/obj/structure/table/O in next_turf)
+					O.ex_act(1)
+					sleep(5)
+				for(var/obj/structure/closet/C in next_turf)
+					C.ex_act(1)
+					sleep(5)
+				for(var/obj/structure/grille/G in next_turf)
+					G.ex_act(1)
+					sleep(5)
+				for(var/obj/machinery/door/airlock/A in next_turf)
+					if(A.welded || A.locked) //Snowflakey code to take in account bolts and welding
+						break
+					A.open()
+					sleep(5)
+				for(var/obj/machinery/door/D in next_turf)
+					D.open()
+					sleep(5)
+				if(!next_turf.CanPass(src, next_turf)) //Once we cleared everything we could, check one last time if we can pass
+					break
+				forceMove(next_turf)
+				dir = get_dir(src, target_turf)
+				next_turf = get_step(src, get_dir(next_turf,target_turf))
+				num_turfs--
+		//Coding note : This is known to allow SCP to end up on tiles that contain obstructing structures (doors, machinery, etc)
+		//Although he CAN'T pass through them during normal movement. Will look into a fix soon
+
+	//Do we have a vent ? Good, let's take a look
+	for(entry_vent in view(1, src))
+		if(prob(90)) //10 % chance to consider a vent, to try and avoid constant vent switching
+			return
+		visible_message("<span class='danger'>\The [src] starts trying to slide itself into the vent!</span>")
+		sleep(50) //Let's stop SCP-173 for five seconds to do his parking job
+		..()
+		if(entry_vent.network && entry_vent.network.normal_members.len)
+			var/list/vents = list()
+			for(var/obj/machinery/atmospherics/unary/vent_pump/temp_vent in entry_vent.network.normal_members)
+				vents.Add(temp_vent)
+			if(!vents.len)
+				entry_vent = null
+				return
+			if(!check_los()) //Someone started looking at us
+				return
+			var/obj/machinery/atmospherics/unary/vent_pump/exit_vent = pick(vents)
+			spawn()
+				visible_message("<span class='danger'>\The [src] suddenly disappears into the vent!</span>")
+				loc = exit_vent
+				var/travel_time = round(get_dist(loc, exit_vent.loc)/2)
+				spawn(travel_time)
+					if(!exit_vent || exit_vent.welded)
+						forceMove(get_turf(entry_vent))
+						entry_vent = null
+						visible_message("<span class='danger'>\The [src] suddenly appears from the vent!</span>")
+						return
+
+					forceMove(get_turf(exit_vent))
+					entry_vent = null
+					visible_message("<span class='danger'>\The [src] suddenly appears from the vent!</span>")
+		else
+			entry_vent = null
+
+//This performs an immediate neck snap check, meant to avoid people cheesing SCP-173 by just running faster than Life() refresh
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/proc/check_snap_neck()
+
+	//See if we're able to strangle anyone
+	for(var/mob/living/carbon/M in get_turf(src))
+		if(M.stat == CONSCIOUS && check_los())
+			snap_neck(M)
+			break
+
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/forceMove(atom/destination, var/no_tp = 0)
+
+	..()
+	check_snap_neck()
+
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/proc/snap_neck(var/mob/living/target)
+
+	if(!check_los())
+		return
+
+	if(target)
+		//To prevent movement cheese, SCP snaps necks the second it ends up on the same turf as someone
+		//Or in other terms, if SCP decides it had a clean shot for a neck snap at the moment this proc fired, you're good as dead
+		target.apply_damage(rand(120, 150), BRUTE, "head")
+		target.apply_damage(100, OXY)
+		playsound(target.loc, pick(snap_sound), 50, 1)
+
+		//Warn everyone
+		visible_message("<span class='danger'>[src] [response_snap] [target]!</span>")
+		target << "<span class='alert'><b>[response_snap_target]</b> Your vision fades away...</span>"
+
+		target.death() //Immediately trigger death to avoid doublesnap during lag
+
+		//Logging stuff
+		target.attack_log += text("\[[time_stamp()]\] <font color='red'>Has had his neck snapped by [src]!</font>")
+		log_admin("[target] ([target.ckey]) has had his neck snapped by an active [src].")
+		message_admins("ALERT: <A HREF='?_src_=holder;adminplayerobservecoodjump=1;X=[target.x];Y=[target.y];Z=[target.z]'>[target.real_name]</a> has had his neck snapped by an active [src].")
+
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/attackby(var/obj/item/O as obj, var/mob/user as mob)
+	..()
+
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/Topic(href, href_list)
+	..()
+
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/Bump(atom/movable/AM as mob)
+	if(!check_los())
+		snap_neck(AM)
+	..()
+
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/Bumped(atom/movable/AM as mob, yes)
+	if(!check_los())
+		snap_neck(AM)
+
+//You cannot destroy SCP-173, fool!
+/mob/living/simple_animal/sculpture/ex_act(var/severity)