diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/carbon/brain/update_status.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/carbon/brain/update_status.dm
new file mode 100644
index 00000000000..2532edfe37d
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/carbon/brain/update_status.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,8 @@
+/mob/living/carbon/brain/update_stat()
+	if(status_flags & GODMODE)
+		return
+		// if(health <= min_health)
+	if(health <= config.health_threshold_dead)
+		if(stat != DEAD)
+			death()
+			// Put brain(organ) damaging code here
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/carbon/update_status.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/carbon/update_status.dm
new file mode 100644
index 00000000000..6b333c19d07
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/carbon/update_status.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,17 @@
+/mob/living/carbon/update_stat()
+	if(status_flags & GODMODE)
+		return
+	if(stat != DEAD)
+//		if(health <= min_health)
+		if(health <= config.health_threshold_dead)
+			death()
+			return
+//		if(paralysis || sleeping || getOxyLoss() > low_oxy_ko || (status_flags & FAKEDEATH) || health <= crit_health)
+		if(paralysis || sleeping || getOxyLoss() > 40 || (status_flags & FAKEDEATH) || health <= config.health_threshold_crit)
+			if(stat == CONSCIOUS)
+				KnockOut()
+		else
+			if(stat == UNCONSCIOUS)
+				// updating=FALSE because `WakeUp` will handle canmove up for us
+				StopResting(updating=FALSE)
+				WakeUp()
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/living.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/living.dm
index 52215b3e08b..dd9e9f7cbd6 100644
--- a/code/modules/mob/living/living.dm
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/living.dm
@@ -310,14 +310,6 @@
 				C.reagents.clear_reagents()
 			C.reagents.addiction_list.Cut()
 
-/mob/living/proc/update_revive() // handles revival through other means than cloning or adminbus (defib, IPC repair)
-	stat = CONSCIOUS
-	dead_mob_list -= src
-	living_mob_list |= src
-	mob_list |= src
-	SetEarDeaf(0)
-	timeofdeath = null
-
 /mob/living/proc/rejuvenate()
 	var/mob/living/carbon/human/human_mob = null //Get this declared for use later.
 
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/ai/update_status.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/ai/update_status.dm
new file mode 100644
index 00000000000..4fa060abf39
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/ai/update_status.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,10 @@
+/mob/living/silicon/ai/update_stat()
+	if(status_flags & GODMODE)
+		return
+	if(stat != DEAD)
+		if(health <= config.health_threshold_dead)
+			death()
+			return
+		else if(stat == UNCONSCIOUS)
+			WakeUp()
+	//diag_hud_set_status()
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/pai/update_status.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/pai/update_status.dm
new file mode 100644
index 00000000000..155ecc84a28
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/pai/update_status.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,3 @@
+/mob/living/silicon/pai/update_stat()
+	if(health <= 0)
+		death(gibbed = 0)
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/robot/drone/update_status.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/robot/drone/update_status.dm
new file mode 100644
index 00000000000..97d2214c2e2
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/robot/drone/update_status.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,10 @@
+//Easiest to check this here, then check again in the robot proc.
+//Standard robots use config for crit, which is somewhat excessive for these guys.
+//Drones killed by damage will gib.
+/mob/living/silicon/robot/drone/update_stat()
+	if(status_flags & GODMODE)
+		return
+	if(health <= -35 && stat != DEAD)
+		gib()
+		return
+	return ..()
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/robot/update_status.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/robot/update_status.dm
index ecdee3c023b..a28aae28278 100644
--- a/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/robot/update_status.dm
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/silicon/robot/update_status.dm
@@ -2,3 +2,20 @@
 /mob/living/silicon/robot/incapacitated()
 	if(stat || lockcharge || weakened || stunned || paralysis || !is_component_functioning("actuator"))
 		return 1
+
+/mob/living/silicon/robot/update_stat()
+	if(status_flags & GODMODE)
+		return
+	if(stat != DEAD)
+		if(health <= -maxHealth) //die only once
+			death()
+			return
+		if(!is_component_functioning("actuator") || paralysis || sleeping || stunned || weakened || getOxyLoss() > maxHealth * 0.5)
+			if(stat == CONSCIOUS)
+				KnockOut()
+		else
+			if(stat == UNCONSCIOUS)
+				WakeUp()
+	// diag_hud_set_status()
+	// diag_hud_set_health()
+	// update_health_hud()
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/stat_states.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/stat_states.dm
new file mode 100644
index 00000000000..49c91a10d99
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/stat_states.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,50 @@
+// There, now `stat` is a proper state-machine
+
+/mob/living/proc/KnockOut(updating = 1)
+	if(stat == DEAD)
+		log_runtime(EXCEPTION("KnockOut called on a dead mob."), src)
+		return 0
+	else if(stat == UNCONSCIOUS)
+		return 0
+	add_logs(src, null, "fallen unconscious at [atom_loc_line(get_turf(src))]", admin=0)
+	stat = UNCONSCIOUS
+	if(updating)
+	// 	update_blind_effects()
+		update_canmove()
+	return 1
+
+/mob/living/proc/WakeUp(updating = 1)
+	if(stat == DEAD)
+		log_runtime(EXCEPTION("WakeUp called on a dead mob."), src)
+		return 0
+	else if(stat == CONSCIOUS)
+		return 0
+	add_logs(src, null, "woken up at [atom_loc_line(get_turf(src))]", admin=0)
+	stat = CONSCIOUS
+	if(updating)
+		// update_blind_effects()
+		update_canmove()
+	return 1
+
+/mob/living/proc/can_be_revived()
+	. = TRUE
+	// if(health <= min_health)
+	if(health <= config.health_threshold_dead)
+		return FALSE
+
+// death() is used to make a mob die
+
+// handles revival through other means than cloning or adminbus (defib, IPC repair)
+/mob/living/proc/update_revive()
+	if(stat != DEAD)
+		return
+	if(!can_be_revived())
+		return
+	add_logs(src, null, "came back to life at [atom_loc_line(get_turf(src))]", admin=0)
+	stat = CONSCIOUS
+	dead_mob_list -= src
+	living_mob_list += src
+	timeofdeath = null
+	update_canmove()
+	// update_blind_effects()
+	updatehealth()
diff --git a/paradise.dme b/paradise.dme
index bd6e246e18c..76be0a60f57 100644
--- a/paradise.dme
+++ b/paradise.dme
@@ -1457,6 +1457,7 @@
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\login.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\logout.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\say.dm"
+#include "code\modules\mob\living\stat_states.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\status_procs.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\update_status.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\_defines.dm"
@@ -1469,6 +1470,7 @@
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\shock.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\superheroes.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\update_icons.dm"
+#include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\update_status.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\alien\alien.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\alien\alien_defenses.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\alien\death.dm"
@@ -1505,6 +1507,7 @@
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\brain\MMI.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\brain\posibrain.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\brain\say.dm"
+#include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\brain\update_status.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\human\appearance.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\human\body_accessories.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\carbon\human\death.dm"
@@ -1562,6 +1565,7 @@
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\ai\login.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\ai\logout.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\ai\say.dm"
+#include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\ai\update_status.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\ai\freelook\cameranet.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\ai\freelook\chunk.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\ai\freelook\eye.dm"
@@ -1578,6 +1582,7 @@
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\pai\say.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\pai\software.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\pai\software_modules.dm"
+#include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\pai\update_status.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\robot\component.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\robot\death.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\robot\emote.dm"
@@ -1600,6 +1605,7 @@
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\robot\drone\drone_items.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\robot\drone\drone_manufacturer.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\robot\drone\drone_say.dm"
+#include "code\modules\mob\living\silicon\robot\drone\update_status.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\simple_animal\constructs.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\simple_animal\corpse.dm"
 #include "code\modules\mob\living\simple_animal\parrot.dm"