diff --git a/code/modules/reagents/chemistry/machinery/chem_dispenser.dm b/code/modules/reagents/chemistry/machinery/chem_dispenser.dm
index dc628655580..34b36b0354c 100644
--- a/code/modules/reagents/chemistry/machinery/chem_dispenser.dm
+++ b/code/modules/reagents/chemistry/machinery/chem_dispenser.dm
@@ -373,7 +373,7 @@
 	name = "booze dispenser"
 	ui_title = "Booze Portal 9001"
 	desc = "A technological marvel, supposedly able to mix just the mixture you'd like to drink the moment you ask for one."
-	dispensable_reagents = list("ice", "cream", "cider", "beer", "kahlua", "whiskey", "wine", "vodka", "gin", "rum", "tequila", "vermouth", "cognac", "ale", "mead", "synthanol")
+	dispensable_reagents = list("ice", "cream", "cider", "beer", "kahlua", "whiskey", "wine", "vodka", "gin", "rum", "tequila", "vermouth", "cognac", "ale", "mead", "synthanol", "lager", "stout")
 	upgrade_reagents = list("iced_beer", "irishcream", "manhattan", "antihol", "synthignon", "bravebull")
 	hacked_reagents = list("goldschlager", "patron", "absinthe", "ethanol", "nothing", "sake")
 	hack_message = "You disable the 'nanotrasen-are-cheap-bastards' lock, enabling hidden and very expensive boozes."
diff --git a/code/modules/reagents/chemistry/reagents/alcohol.dm b/code/modules/reagents/chemistry/reagents/alcohol.dm
index fa8761a520a..af10f6ee3f9 100644
--- a/code/modules/reagents/chemistry/reagents/alcohol.dm
+++ b/code/modules/reagents/chemistry/reagents/alcohol.dm
@@ -1862,3 +1862,32 @@
 	mutated = TRUE
 
 	return ..()
+
+/datum/reagent/consumable/ethanol/lager
+	name = "Lager"
+	id = "lager"
+	description = "A pale beer commonly drank by football hooligans"
+	color = "#664300"
+	alcohol_perc = 0.4
+	drink_icon = "lagerglass"
+	drink_name = "Starlink Lager"
+	drink_desc = "A pale beer that's the cause of many a soccer-related fight"
+	taste_description = "an own goal"
+
+/datum/reagent/consumable/ethanol/stout
+	name = "Stout"
+	id = "stout"
+	description = "A pitch black beer, high in iron content"
+	color = "#000000"
+	alcohol_perc = 0.4
+	drink_icon = "stoutglass"
+	drink_name = "Stout"
+	drink_desc = "A pitch black beer from Ireland, high in iron content"
+	taste_description = "the luck of the Irish"
+
+/datum/reagent/consumable/ethanol/stout/on_mob_life(mob/living/M) // Replenishes blood, seeing as there's iron in it
+	if(ishuman(M))
+		var/mob/living/carbon/human/H = M
+		if(!(NO_BLOOD in H.dna.species.species_traits) && (H.blood_volume < BLOOD_VOLUME_NORMAL))
+			H.blood_volume += 0.4
+	return ..()
diff --git a/icons/obj/drinks.dmi b/icons/obj/drinks.dmi
index 83954bf057c..cd34dfa6219 100644
Binary files a/icons/obj/drinks.dmi and b/icons/obj/drinks.dmi differ