diff --git a/code/controllers/master_controller.dm b/code/controllers/master_controller.dm
index 73b27adcca9..97650fcf307 100644
--- a/code/controllers/master_controller.dm
+++ b/code/controllers/master_controller.dm
@@ -90,9 +90,13 @@ datum/controller/game_controller/proc/setup()
 	setup_economy()
 	SetupXenoarch()
 	cachedamageicons()
-
+	if(map && map.dorf)
+		mining_surprises = typesof(/mining_surprise/dorf) - /mining_surprise/dorf
 	for(var/i=0, i<max_secret_rooms, i++)
-		make_mining_asteroid_secret()
+		if(map && map.dorf)
+			make_dorf_secret()
+		else
+			make_mining_asteroid_secret()
 
 	//if(config.socket_talk)
 	//	keepalive()
diff --git a/code/game/machinery/machinery.dm b/code/game/machinery/machinery.dm
index 0c0ac2bb22f..3f61f6778bf 100644
--- a/code/game/machinery/machinery.dm
+++ b/code/game/machinery/machinery.dm
@@ -319,6 +319,8 @@ Class Procs:
 	..()
 	if(stat & (NOPOWER|BROKEN))
 		return 1
+	if(href_list["close"])
+		return
 	var/ghost_flags=0
 	if(ghost_write)
 		ghost_flags |= PERMIT_ALL
diff --git a/code/game/machinery/mommi_spawner.dm b/code/game/machinery/mommi_spawner.dm
index 36178c6385c..ddfe3755852 100644
--- a/code/game/machinery/mommi_spawner.dm
+++ b/code/game/machinery/mommi_spawner.dm
@@ -15,6 +15,15 @@
 	var/recharge_time=600 // 60s
 	var/locked_to_zlevel = 0 // Whether to lock the spawned MoMMIs to the z-level
 
+/obj/machinery/mommi_spawner/dorf
+	machine_flags = WRENCHMOVE
+	desc = "A large pad mounted to the ground with large bolts."
+
+/obj/machinery/mommi_spawner/dorf/attack_ghost(var/mob/dead/observer/user)
+	if(stat & NOPOWER|BROKEN)
+		return
+	..()
+
 /obj/machinery/mommi_spawner/power_change()
 	if (powered())
 		stat &= ~NOPOWER
@@ -79,51 +88,52 @@
 		makeMoMMI(user)
 
 /obj/machinery/mommi_spawner/attackby(var/obj/item/O as obj, var/mob/user as mob)
-	if(istype(O,/obj/item/device/mmi))
-		var/obj/item/device/mmi/mmi = O
-		if(building)
-			user << "\red \The [src] is busy building something already."
-			return 1
-		if(!mmi.brainmob)
-			user << "\red \The [mmi] appears to be devoid of any soul."
-			return 1
-		if(!mmi.brainmob.key)
-			var/ghost_can_reenter = 0
-			if(mmi.brainmob.mind)
-				for(var/mob/dead/observer/G in player_list)
-					if(G.can_reenter_corpse && G.mind == mmi.brainmob.mind)
-						ghost_can_reenter = 1
-						break
-			if(!ghost_can_reenter)
-				user << "<span class='notice'>\The [src] indicates that their mind is completely unresponsive; there's no point.</span>"
+	if(!..())
+		if(istype(O,/obj/item/device/mmi))
+			var/obj/item/device/mmi/mmi = O
+			if(building)
+				user << "\red \The [src] is busy building something already."
+				return 1
+			if(!mmi.brainmob)
+				user << "\red \The [mmi] appears to be devoid of any soul."
+				return 1
+			if(!mmi.brainmob.key)
+				var/ghost_can_reenter = 0
+				if(mmi.brainmob.mind)
+					for(var/mob/dead/observer/G in player_list)
+						if(G.can_reenter_corpse && G.mind == mmi.brainmob.mind)
+							ghost_can_reenter = 1
+							break
+				if(!ghost_can_reenter)
+					user << "<span class='notice'>\The [src] indicates that their mind is completely unresponsive; there's no point.</span>"
+					return TRUE
+
+			if(mmi.brainmob.stat == DEAD)
+				user << "\red Yeah, good idea. Give something deader than the pizza in your fridge legs.  Mom would be so proud."
 				return TRUE
 
-		if(mmi.brainmob.stat == DEAD)
-			user << "\red Yeah, good idea. Give something deader than the pizza in your fridge legs.  Mom would be so proud."
-			return TRUE
+			if(mmi.brainmob.mind in ticker.mode.head_revolutionaries)
+				user << "\red \The [src]'s firmware lets out a shrill sound, and flashes 'Abnormal Memory Engram'. It refuses to accept \the [mmi]."
+				return TRUE
 
-		if(mmi.brainmob.mind in ticker.mode.head_revolutionaries)
-			user << "\red \The [src]'s firmware lets out a shrill sound, and flashes 'Abnormal Memory Engram'. It refuses to accept \the [mmi]."
-			return TRUE
+			if(jobban_isbanned(mmi.brainmob, "Cyborg"))
+				user << "\red \The [src] lets out an annoyed buzz and rejects \the [mmi]."
+				return TRUE
 
-		if(jobban_isbanned(mmi.brainmob, "Cyborg"))
-			user << "\red \The [src] lets out an annoyed buzz and rejects \the [mmi]."
-			return TRUE
+			if(metal < metalPerMoMMI)
+				user << "\red \The [src] doesn't have enough metal to complete this task."
+				return TRUE
 
-		if(metal < metalPerMoMMI)
-			user << "\red \The [src] doesn't have enough metal to complete this task."
+			building=1
+			update_icon()
+			user.drop_item()
+			mmi.icon = null
+			mmi.invisibility = 101
+			mmi.loc=src
+			spawn(50)
+				makeMoMMI(mmi.brainmob)
 			return TRUE
 
-		building=1
-		update_icon()
-		user.drop_item()
-		mmi.icon = null
-		mmi.invisibility = 101
-		mmi.loc=src
-		spawn(50)
-			makeMoMMI(mmi.brainmob)
-		return TRUE
-
 /obj/machinery/mommi_spawner/proc/makeMoMMI(var/mob/user)
 	var/turf/T = get_turf(src)
 
diff --git a/code/modules/events/event_dynamic.dm b/code/modules/events/event_dynamic.dm
index f1ae5ca1659..53fc2e2dda5 100644
--- a/code/modules/events/event_dynamic.dm
+++ b/code/modules/events/event_dynamic.dm
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ var/list/event_last_fired = list()
 
 //Always triggers an event when called, dynamically chooses events based on job population
 /proc/spawn_dynamic_event()
-	if(!config.allow_random_events)
+	if(!config.allow_random_events || map && map.dorf)
 		return
 
 	var/minutes_passed = world.time/600
diff --git a/code/modules/mining/surprise.dm b/code/modules/mining/surprise.dm
index f8e2492ccc2..891e191afae 100644
--- a/code/modules/mining/surprise.dm
+++ b/code/modules/mining/surprise.dm
@@ -3,6 +3,7 @@
 
 #define TURF_FLOOR 0
 #define TURF_WALL 1
+
 var/global/list/mining_surprises = typesof(/mining_surprise)-/mining_surprise
 
 /surprise_turf_info
diff --git a/maps/_map.dm b/maps/_map.dm
index a486ae07803..f9dc8bd644e 100644
--- a/maps/_map.dm
+++ b/maps/_map.dm
@@ -26,6 +26,9 @@
 	//nanoui stuff
 	var/map_dir = ""
 
+	//Fuck the preprocessor
+	var/dorf = 0
+
 /datum/map/New()
 	. = ..()
 	src.zLevels = src.loadZLevels(src.zLevels)