I got it for sure this time for real. I'm sure

also fixes random spawns, but sorta. it might not be so great with RNG being a thing

code/modules/client/preferences.dm

@@ -1475,7 +1475,7 @@ GLOBAL_LIST_EMPTY(preferences_datums)
 							features["mam_tail"] = "None"
 
 				if("tail_human")
-					var/list/snowflake_tails_list = list("Normal" = null)
+					var/list/snowflake_tails_list = list("None" = null)
 					for(var/path in GLOB.tails_list_human)
 						var/datum/sprite_accessory/tails/human/instance = GLOB.tails_list_human[path]
 						if(istype(instance, /datum/sprite_accessory))
@@ -1492,7 +1492,7 @@ GLOBAL_LIST_EMPTY(preferences_datums)
 							features["mam_tail"] = "None"
 
 				if("mam_tail")
-					var/list/snowflake_tails_list = list("Normal" = null)
+					var/list/snowflake_tails_list = list("None" = null)
 					for(var/path in GLOB.mam_tails_list)
 						var/datum/sprite_accessory/mam_tails/instance = GLOB.mam_tails_list[path]
 						if(istype(instance, /datum/sprite_accessory))

code/modules/mob/living/carbon/carbon_defense.dm

@@ -272,12 +272,35 @@
 
 		else if(check_zone(M.zone_selected) == "head")
 			var/mob/living/carbon/human/H = src
+			var/datum/species/pref_species = H.dna.species
+
 			M.visible_message("<span class='notice'>[M] gives [H] a pat on the head to make [p_them()] feel better!</span>", \
 						"<span class='notice'>You give [H] a pat on the head to make [p_them()] feel better!</span>")
 			SEND_SIGNAL(src, COMSIG_ADD_MOOD_EVENT, "headpat", /datum/mood_event/headpat)
-			if(H.dna.species.can_wag_tail(H) && (H.dna.features["tail_human"]!= "None" || H.dna.features["tail_lizard"]!= "None" || H.dna.features["mam_tail"])!= "None")
-				if(!H.dna.species.is_wagging_tail())
-					H.emote("wag")
+			if(H.dna.species.can_wag_tail(H))
+				if("tail_human" in pref_species.default_features)
+					if(H.dna.features["tail_human"] == "None")
+						return
+					else
+						if(!H.dna.species.is_wagging_tail())
+							H.emote("wag")
+
+				if("tail_lizard" in pref_species.default_features)
+					if(H.dna.features["tail_lizard"] == "None")
+						return
+					else
+						if(!H.dna.species.is_wagging_tail())
+							H.emote("wag")
+
+				if("mam_tail" in pref_species.default_features)
+					if(H.dna.features["mam_tail"] == "None")
+						return
+					else
+						if(!H.dna.species.is_wagging_tail())
+							H.emote("wag")
+
+			else
+				return
 
 		else
 			M.visible_message("<span class='notice'>[M] hugs [src] to make [p_them()] feel better!</span>", \

code/modules/mob/living/carbon/human/species_types/humans.dm

@@ -3,8 +3,8 @@
 	id = "human"
 	default_color = "FFFFFF"
 	species_traits = list(EYECOLOR,HAIR,FACEHAIR,LIPS,MUTCOLORS_PARTSONLY)
-	mutant_bodyparts = list("mam_tail", "mam_ears", "wings", "taur") // CITADEL EDIT gives humans snowflake parts
-	default_features = list("mcolor" = "FFF", "mam_tail" = "None", "mam_ears" = "None", "wings" = "None", "taur" = "None")
+	mutant_bodyparts = list("ears", "tail_human", "wings", "taur") // CITADEL EDIT gives humans snowflake parts
+	default_features = list("mcolor" = "FFF", "tail_human" = "None", "ears" = "None", "wings" = "None", "taur" = "None")
 	use_skintones = 1
 	skinned_type = /obj/item/stack/sheet/animalhide/human
 	disliked_food = GROSS | RAW
@@ -23,19 +23,19 @@
 	. = ..()
 
 /datum/species/human/can_wag_tail(mob/living/carbon/human/H)
-	return ("mam_tail" in mutant_bodyparts) || ("mam_waggingtail" in mutant_bodyparts)
+	return ("tail_human" in mutant_bodyparts) || ("waggingtail_human" in mutant_bodyparts)
 
 /datum/species/human/is_wagging_tail(mob/living/carbon/human/H)
-	return ("mam_waggingtail" in mutant_bodyparts)
+	return ("waggingtail_human" in mutant_bodyparts)
 
 /datum/species/human/start_wagging_tail(mob/living/carbon/human/H)
-	if("mam_tail" in mutant_bodyparts)
-		mutant_bodyparts -= "mam_tail"
-		mutant_bodyparts |= "mam_waggingtail"
+	if("tail_human" in mutant_bodyparts)
+		mutant_bodyparts -= "tail_human"
+		mutant_bodyparts |= "waggingtail_human"
 	H.update_body()
 
 /datum/species/human/stop_wagging_tail(mob/living/carbon/human/H)
-	if("mam_waggingtail" in mutant_bodyparts)
-		mutant_bodyparts -= "mam_waggingtail"
-		mutant_bodyparts |= "mam_tail"
+	if("waggingtail_human" in mutant_bodyparts)
+		mutant_bodyparts -= "waggingtail_human"
+		mutant_bodyparts |= "tail_human"
 	H.update_body()