diff --git a/code/datums/mutations.dm b/code/datums/mutations.dm
index c19dc2c180..24ccdff244 100644
--- a/code/datums/mutations.dm
+++ b/code/datums/mutations.dm
@@ -113,6 +113,7 @@ GLOBAL_LIST_EMPTY(mutations_list)
 /datum/mutation/human/proc/get_spans()
 	return list()
 
+<<<<<<< HEAD
 /datum/mutation/human/hulk
 
 	name = "Hulk"
@@ -650,6 +651,8 @@ GLOBAL_LIST_EMPTY(mutations_list)
 		owner.LaserEyes(target, mouseparams)
 
 
+=======
+>>>>>>> b6741ca... Splits mutations from mutations.dm into a subfolder, /datums/mutations (#33079)
 /mob/living/carbon/proc/update_mutations_overlay()
 	return
 
diff --git a/code/datums/mutations/body.dm b/code/datums/mutations/body.dm
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..23b91add58
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/datums/mutations/body.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,148 @@
+//These mutations change your overall "form" somehow, like size
+
+//Epilepsy gives a very small chance to have a seizure every life tick, knocking you unconscious.
+/datum/mutation/human/epilepsy
+	name = "Epilepsy"
+	quality = NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You get a headache.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/epilepsy/on_life(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(prob(1) && owner.stat == CONSCIOUS)
+		owner.visible_message("<span class='danger'>[owner] starts having a seizure!</span>", "<span class='userdanger'>You have a seizure!</span>")
+		owner.Unconscious(200)
+		owner.Jitter(1000)
+		addtimer(CALLBACK(src, .proc/jitter_less, owner), 90)
+
+/datum/mutation/human/epilepsy/proc/jitter_less(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(owner)
+		owner.jitteriness = 10
+
+
+//Unstable DNA induces random mutations!
+/datum/mutation/human/bad_dna
+	name = "Unstable DNA"
+	quality = NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You feel strange.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/bad_dna/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	to_chat(owner, text_gain_indication)
+	var/mob/new_mob
+	if(prob(95))
+		if(prob(50))
+			new_mob = owner.randmutb()
+		else
+			new_mob = owner.randmuti()
+	else
+		new_mob = owner.randmutg()
+	if(new_mob && ismob(new_mob))
+		owner = new_mob
+	. = owner
+	on_losing(owner)
+
+
+//Cough gives you a chronic cough that causes you to drop items.
+/datum/mutation/human/cough
+	name = "Cough"
+	quality = MINOR_NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You start coughing.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/cough/on_life(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(prob(5) && owner.stat == CONSCIOUS)
+		owner.drop_all_held_items()
+		owner.emote("cough")
+
+
+//Dwarfism shrinks your body and lets you pass tables.
+/datum/mutation/human/dwarfism
+	name = "Dwarfism"
+	quality = POSITIVE
+	get_chance = 15
+	lowest_value = 256 * 12
+
+/datum/mutation/human/dwarfism/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.resize = 0.8
+	owner.update_transform()
+	owner.pass_flags |= PASSTABLE
+	owner.visible_message("<span class='danger'>[owner] suddenly shrinks!</span>", "<span class='notice'>Everything around you seems to grow..</span>")
+
+/datum/mutation/human/dwarfism/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.resize = 1.25
+	owner.update_transform()
+	owner.pass_flags &= ~PASSTABLE
+	owner.visible_message("<span class='danger'>[owner] suddenly grows!</span>", "<span class='notice'>Everything around you seems to shrink..</span>")
+
+
+//Clumsiness has a very large amount of small drawbacks depending on item.
+/datum/mutation/human/clumsy
+	name = "Clumsiness"
+	quality = MINOR_NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You feel lightheaded.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/clumsy/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.disabilities |= CLUMSY
+
+/datum/mutation/human/clumsy/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.disabilities &= ~CLUMSY
+
+
+//Tourettes causes you to randomly stand in place and shout.
+/datum/mutation/human/tourettes
+	name = "Tourettes Syndrome"
+	quality = NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You twitch.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/tourettes/on_life(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(prob(10) && owner.stat == CONSCIOUS)
+		owner.Stun(200)
+		switch(rand(1, 3))
+			if(1)
+				owner.emote("twitch")
+			if(2 to 3)
+				owner.say("[prob(50) ? ";" : ""][pick("SHIT", "PISS", "FUCK", "CUNT", "COCKSUCKER", "MOTHERFUCKER", "TITS")]")
+		var/x_offset_old = owner.pixel_x
+		var/y_offset_old = owner.pixel_y
+		var/x_offset = owner.pixel_x + rand(-2,2)
+		var/y_offset = owner.pixel_y + rand(-1,1)
+		animate(owner, pixel_x = x_offset, pixel_y = y_offset, time = 1)
+		animate(owner, pixel_x = x_offset_old, pixel_y = y_offset_old, time = 1)
+
+
+//Deafness makes you deaf.
+/datum/mutation/human/deaf
+	name = "Deafness"
+	quality = NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You can't seem to hear anything.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/deaf/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.disabilities |= DEAF
+
+/datum/mutation/human/deaf/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.disabilities &= ~DEAF
+
+
+//Monified turns you into a monkey.
+/datum/mutation/human/race
+	name = "Monkified"
+	quality = NEGATIVE
+	time_coeff = 2
+
+/datum/mutation/human/race/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	. = owner.monkeyize(TR_KEEPITEMS | TR_KEEPIMPLANTS | TR_KEEPORGANS | TR_KEEPDAMAGE | TR_KEEPVIRUS | TR_KEEPSE)
+
+/datum/mutation/human/race/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/monkey/owner)
+	if(owner && istype(owner) && owner.stat != DEAD && (owner.dna.mutations.Remove(src)))
+		. = owner.humanize(TR_KEEPITEMS | TR_KEEPIMPLANTS | TR_KEEPORGANS | TR_KEEPDAMAGE | TR_KEEPVIRUS | TR_KEEPSE)
diff --git a/code/datums/mutations/chameleon.dm b/code/datums/mutations/chameleon.dm
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..da10510970
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/datums/mutations/chameleon.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,30 @@
+//Chameleon causes the owner to slowly become transparent when not moving.
+/datum/mutation/human/chameleon
+	name = "Chameleon"
+	quality = POSITIVE
+	get_chance = 20
+	lowest_value = 256 * 12
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>You feel one with your surroundings.</span>"
+	text_lose_indication = "<span class='notice'>You feel oddly exposed.</span>"
+	time_coeff = 5
+
+/datum/mutation/human/chameleon/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.alpha = CHAMELEON_MUTATION_DEFAULT_TRANSPARENCY
+
+/datum/mutation/human/chameleon/on_life(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	owner.alpha = max(0, owner.alpha - 25)
+
+/datum/mutation/human/chameleon/on_move(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	owner.alpha = CHAMELEON_MUTATION_DEFAULT_TRANSPARENCY
+
+/datum/mutation/human/chameleon/on_attack_hand(mob/living/carbon/human/owner, atom/target, proximity)
+	if(proximity) //stops tk from breaking chameleon
+		owner.alpha = CHAMELEON_MUTATION_DEFAULT_TRANSPARENCY
+		return
+
+/datum/mutation/human/chameleon/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.alpha = 255
diff --git a/code/datums/mutations/cold_resistance.dm b/code/datums/mutations/cold_resistance.dm
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..6281514e71
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/datums/mutations/cold_resistance.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,20 @@
+//Cold Resistance gives your entire body an orange halo, and makes you immune to the effects of vacuum and cold.
+/datum/mutation/human/cold_resistance
+	name = "Cold Resistance"
+	quality = POSITIVE
+	get_chance = 25
+	lowest_value = 256 * 12
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>Your body feels warm!</span>"
+	time_coeff = 5
+
+/datum/mutation/human/cold_resistance/New()
+	..()
+	visual_indicators |= mutable_appearance('icons/effects/genetics.dmi', "fire", -MUTATIONS_LAYER)
+
+/datum/mutation/human/cold_resistance/get_visual_indicator(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	return visual_indicators[1]
+
+/datum/mutation/human/cold_resistance/on_life(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(owner.getFireLoss())
+		if(prob(1))
+			owner.heal_bodypart_damage(0,1)   //Is this really needed?
diff --git a/code/datums/mutations/hulk.dm b/code/datums/mutations/hulk.dm
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..9340361930
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/datums/mutations/hulk.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,36 @@
+//Hulk turns your skin green, and allows you to punch through walls.
+/datum/mutation/human/hulk
+	name = "Hulk"
+	quality = POSITIVE
+	get_chance = 15
+	lowest_value = 256 * 12
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>Your muscles hurt!</span>"
+	species_allowed = list("human") //no skeleton/lizard hulk
+	health_req = 25
+
+/datum/mutation/human/hulk/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	var/status = CANSTUN | CANKNOCKDOWN | CANUNCONSCIOUS | CANPUSH
+	owner.status_flags &= ~status
+	owner.update_body_parts()
+
+/datum/mutation/human/hulk/on_attack_hand(mob/living/carbon/human/owner, atom/target, proximity)
+	if(proximity) //no telekinetic hulk attack
+		return target.attack_hulk(owner)
+
+/datum/mutation/human/hulk/on_life(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(owner.health < 0)
+		on_losing(owner)
+		to_chat(owner, "<span class='danger'>You suddenly feel very weak.</span>")
+
+/datum/mutation/human/hulk/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.status_flags |= CANSTUN | CANKNOCKDOWN | CANUNCONSCIOUS | CANPUSH
+	owner.update_body_parts()
+
+/datum/mutation/human/hulk/say_mod(message)
+	if(message)
+		message = "[uppertext(replacetext(message, ".", "!"))]!!"
+	return message
diff --git a/code/datums/mutations/sight.dm b/code/datums/mutations/sight.dm
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..dee26166dd
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/datums/mutations/sight.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,74 @@
+//Nearsightedness restricts your vision by several tiles.
+/datum/mutation/human/nearsight
+	name = "Near Sightness"
+	quality = MINOR_NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You can't see very well.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/nearsight/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.become_nearsighted()
+
+/datum/mutation/human/nearsight/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.cure_nearsighted()
+
+
+//Blind makes you blind. Who knew?
+/datum/mutation/human/blind
+	name = "Blindness"
+	quality = NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You can't seem to see anything.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/blind/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.become_blind()
+
+/datum/mutation/human/blind/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.cure_blind()
+
+
+//X-Ray Vision lets you see through walls.
+/datum/mutation/human/x_ray
+	name = "X Ray Vision"
+	quality = POSITIVE
+	get_chance = 25
+	lowest_value = 256 * 12
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>The walls suddenly disappear!</span>"
+	time_coeff = 2
+
+/datum/mutation/human/x_ray/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+
+	owner.update_sight()
+
+/datum/mutation/human/x_ray/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.update_sight()
+
+
+//Laser Eyes lets you shoot lasers from your eyes!
+/datum/mutation/human/laser_eyes
+	name = "Laser Eyes"
+	quality = POSITIVE
+	dna_block = NON_SCANNABLE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>You feel pressure building up behind your eyes.</span>"
+	layer_used = FRONT_MUTATIONS_LAYER
+	limb_req = "head"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/laser_eyes/New()
+	..()
+	visual_indicators |= mutable_appearance('icons/effects/genetics.dmi', "lasereyes", -FRONT_MUTATIONS_LAYER)
+
+/datum/mutation/human/laser_eyes/get_visual_indicator(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	return visual_indicators[1]
+
+/datum/mutation/human/laser_eyes/on_ranged_attack(mob/living/carbon/human/owner, atom/target, mouseparams)
+	if(owner.a_intent == INTENT_HARM)
+		owner.LaserEyes(target, mouseparams)
diff --git a/code/datums/mutations/speech.dm b/code/datums/mutations/speech.dm
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..2959c73125
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/datums/mutations/speech.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,231 @@
+//These are all minor mutations that affect your speech somehow.
+//Individual ones aren't commented since their functions should be evident at a glance
+
+/datum/mutation/human/nervousness
+	name = "Nervousness"
+	quality = MINOR_NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You feel nervous.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/nervousness/on_life(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(prob(10))
+		owner.stuttering = max(10, owner.stuttering)
+
+
+/datum/mutation/human/wacky
+	name = "Wacky"
+	quality = MINOR_NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='sans'>You feel an off sensation in your voicebox.</span>"
+	text_lose_indication = "<span class='notice'>The off sensation passes.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/wacky/get_spans()
+	return list(SPAN_SANS)
+
+
+/datum/mutation/human/mute
+	name = "Mute"
+	quality = NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You feel unable to express yourself at all.</span>"
+	text_lose_indication = "<span class='danger'>You feel able to speak freely again.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/mute/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.disabilities |= MUTE
+
+/datum/mutation/human/mute/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	if(..())
+		return
+	owner.disabilities &= ~MUTE
+
+
+/datum/mutation/human/smile
+	name = "Smile"
+	quality = MINOR_NEGATIVE
+	dna_block = NON_SCANNABLE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>You feel so happy. Nothing can be wrong with anything. :)</span>"
+	text_lose_indication = "<span class='notice'>Everything is terrible again. :(</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/smile/say_mod(message)
+	if(message)
+		message = " [message] "
+		//Time for a friendly game of SS13
+		message = replacetext(message," stupid "," smart ")
+		message = replacetext(message," retard "," genius ")
+		message = replacetext(message," unrobust "," robust ")
+		message = replacetext(message," dumb "," smart ")
+		message = replacetext(message," awful "," great ")
+		message = replacetext(message," gay ",pick(" nice "," ok "," alright "))
+		message = replacetext(message," horrible "," fun ")
+		message = replacetext(message," terrible "," terribly fun ")
+		message = replacetext(message," terrifying "," wonderful ")
+		message = replacetext(message," gross "," cool ")
+		message = replacetext(message," disgusting "," amazing ")
+		message = replacetext(message," loser "," winner ")
+		message = replacetext(message," useless "," useful ")
+		message = replacetext(message," oh god "," cheese and crackers ")
+		message = replacetext(message," jesus "," gee wiz ")
+		message = replacetext(message," weak "," strong ")
+		message = replacetext(message," kill "," hug ")
+		message = replacetext(message," murder "," tease ")
+		message = replacetext(message," ugly "," beautiful ")
+		message = replacetext(message," douchbag "," nice guy ")
+		message = replacetext(message," whore "," lady ")
+		message = replacetext(message," nerd "," smart guy ")
+		message = replacetext(message," moron "," fun person ")
+		message = replacetext(message," IT'S LOOSE "," EVERYTHING IS FINE ")
+		message = replacetext(message," sex "," hug fight ")
+		message = replacetext(message," idiot "," genius ")
+		message = replacetext(message," fat "," thin ")
+		message = replacetext(message," beer "," water with ice ")
+		message = replacetext(message," drink "," water ")
+		message = replacetext(message," feminist "," empowered woman ")
+		message = replacetext(message," i hate you "," you're mean ")
+		message = replacetext(message," nigger "," african american ")
+		message = replacetext(message," jew "," jewish ")
+		message = replacetext(message," shit "," shiz ")
+		message = replacetext(message," crap "," poo ")
+		message = replacetext(message," slut "," tease ")
+		message = replacetext(message," ass "," butt ")
+		message = replacetext(message," damn "," dang ")
+		message = replacetext(message," fuck ","  ")
+		message = replacetext(message," penis "," privates ")
+		message = replacetext(message," cunt "," privates ")
+		message = replacetext(message," dick "," jerk ")
+		message = replacetext(message," vagina "," privates ")
+	return trim(message)
+
+
+/datum/mutation/human/unintelligable
+	name = "Unintelligable"
+	quality = NEGATIVE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='danger'>You can't seem to form any coherent thoughts!</span>"
+	text_lose_indication = "<span class='danger'>Your mind feels more clear.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/unintelligable/say_mod(message)
+	if(message)
+		var/prefix=copytext(message,1,2)
+		if(prefix == ";")
+			message = copytext(message,2)
+		else if(prefix in list(":","#"))
+			prefix += copytext(message,2,3)
+			message = copytext(message,3)
+		else
+			prefix=""
+
+		var/list/words = splittext(message," ")
+		var/list/rearranged = list()
+		for(var/i=1;i<=words.len;i++)
+			var/cword = pick(words)
+			words.Remove(cword)
+			var/suffix = copytext(cword,length(cword)-1,length(cword))
+			while(length(cword)>0 && suffix in list(".",",",";","!",":","?"))
+				cword  = copytext(cword,1              ,length(cword)-1)
+				suffix = copytext(cword,length(cword)-1,length(cword)  )
+			if(length(cword))
+				rearranged += cword
+		message = "[prefix][uppertext(jointext(rearranged," "))]!!"
+	return message
+
+
+/datum/mutation/human/swedish
+	name = "Swedish"
+	quality = MINOR_NEGATIVE
+	dna_block = NON_SCANNABLE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>You feel Swedish, however that works.</span>"
+	text_lose_indication = "<span class='notice'>The feeling of Swedishness passes.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/swedish/say_mod(message)
+	if(message)
+		message = replacetext(message,"w","v")
+		message = replacetext(message,"j","y")
+		message = replacetext(message,"a",pick("�","�","�","a"))
+		message = replacetext(message,"bo","bjo")
+		message = replacetext(message,"o",pick("�","�","o"))
+		if(prob(30))
+			message += " Bork[pick("",", bork",", bork, bork")]!"
+	return message
+
+
+/datum/mutation/human/chav
+	name = "Chav"
+	quality = MINOR_NEGATIVE
+	dna_block = NON_SCANNABLE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>Ye feel like a reet prat like, innit?</span>"
+	text_lose_indication = "<span class='notice'>You no longer feel like being rude and sassy.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/chav/say_mod(message)
+	if(message)
+		message = " [message] "
+		message = replacetext(message," looking at  ","  gawpin' at ")
+		message = replacetext(message," great "," bangin' ")
+		message = replacetext(message," man "," mate ")
+		message = replacetext(message," friend ",pick(" mate "," bruv "," bledrin "))
+		message = replacetext(message," what "," wot ")
+		message = replacetext(message," drink "," wet ")
+		message = replacetext(message," get "," giz ")
+		message = replacetext(message," what "," wot ")
+		message = replacetext(message," no thanks "," wuddent fukken do one ")
+		message = replacetext(message," i don't know "," wot mate ")
+		message = replacetext(message," no "," naw ")
+		message = replacetext(message," robust "," chin ")
+		message = replacetext(message,"  hi  "," how what how ")
+		message = replacetext(message," hello "," sup bruv ")
+		message = replacetext(message," kill "," bang ")
+		message = replacetext(message," murder "," bang ")
+		message = replacetext(message," windows "," windies ")
+		message = replacetext(message," window "," windy ")
+		message = replacetext(message," break "," do ")
+		message = replacetext(message," your "," yer ")
+		message = replacetext(message," security "," coppers ")
+	return trim(message)
+
+
+/datum/mutation/human/elvis
+	name = "Elvis"
+	quality = MINOR_NEGATIVE
+	dna_block = NON_SCANNABLE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>You feel pretty good, honeydoll.</span>"
+	text_lose_indication = "<span class='notice'>You feel a little less conversation would be great.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/elvis/on_life(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	switch(pick(1,2))
+		if(1)
+			if(prob(15))
+				var/list/dancetypes = list("swinging", "fancy", "stylish", "20'th century", "jivin'", "rock and roller", "cool", "salacious", "bashing", "smashing")
+				var/dancemoves = pick(dancetypes)
+				owner.visible_message("<b>[owner]</b> busts out some [dancemoves] moves!")
+		if(2)
+			if(prob(15))
+				owner.visible_message("<b>[owner]</b> [pick("jiggles their hips", "rotates their hips", "gyrates their hips", "taps their foot", "dances to an imaginary song", "jiggles their legs", "snaps their fingers")]!")
+
+/datum/mutation/human/elvis/say_mod(message)
+	if(message)
+		message = " [message] "
+		message = replacetext(message," i'm not "," I aint ")
+		message = replacetext(message," girl ",pick(" honey "," baby "," baby doll "))
+		message = replacetext(message," man ",pick(" son "," buddy "," brother"," pal "," friendo "))
+		message = replacetext(message," out of "," outta ")
+		message = replacetext(message," thank you "," thank you, thank you very much ")
+		message = replacetext(message," what are you "," whatcha ")
+		message = replacetext(message," yes ",pick(" sure", "yea "))
+		message = replacetext(message," faggot "," square ")
+		message = replacetext(message," muh valids "," getting my kicks ")
+	return trim(message)
+
+
+/datum/mutation/human/stoner
+	name = "Stoner"
+	quality = NEGATIVE
+	dna_block = NON_SCANNABLE
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>You feel...totally chill, man!</span>"
+	text_lose_indication = "<span class='notice'>You feel like you have a better sense of time.</span>"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/stoner/on_acquiring(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	..()
+	owner.grant_language(/datum/language/beachbum)
+	owner.remove_language(/datum/language/common)
+
+/datum/mutation/human/stoner/on_losing(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	..()
+	owner.grant_language(/datum/language/common)
+	owner.remove_language(/datum/language/beachbum)
diff --git a/code/datums/mutations/telekinesis.dm b/code/datums/mutations/telekinesis.dm
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..3aa562ee74
--- /dev/null
+++ b/code/datums/mutations/telekinesis.dm
@@ -0,0 +1,18 @@
+//Telekinesis lets you interact with objects from range, and gives you a light blue halo around your head.
+/datum/mutation/human/telekinesis
+	name = "Telekinesis"
+	quality = POSITIVE
+	get_chance = 20
+	lowest_value = 256 * 12
+	text_gain_indication = "<span class='notice'>You feel smarter!</span>"
+	limb_req = "head"
+
+/datum/mutation/human/telekinesis/New()
+	..()
+	visual_indicators |= mutable_appearance('icons/effects/genetics.dmi', "telekinesishead", -MUTATIONS_LAYER)
+
+/datum/mutation/human/telekinesis/get_visual_indicator(mob/living/carbon/human/owner)
+	return visual_indicators[1]
+
+/datum/mutation/human/telekinesis/on_ranged_attack(mob/living/carbon/human/owner, atom/target)
+	target.attack_tk(owner)
diff --git a/tgstation.dme b/tgstation.dme
index e5d267b667..0648584f2e 100755
--- a/tgstation.dme
+++ b/tgstation.dme
@@ -411,6 +411,13 @@
 #include "code\datums\martial\plasma_fist.dm"
 #include "code\datums\martial\sleeping_carp.dm"
 #include "code\datums\martial\wrestling.dm"
+#include "code\datums\mutations\body.dm"
+#include "code\datums\mutations\chameleon.dm"
+#include "code\datums\mutations\cold_resistance.dm"
+#include "code\datums\mutations\hulk.dm"
+#include "code\datums\mutations\sight.dm"
+#include "code\datums\mutations\speech.dm"
+#include "code\datums\mutations\telekinesis.dm"
 #include "code\datums\ruins\lavaland.dm"
 #include "code\datums\ruins\space.dm"
 #include "code\datums\status_effects\buffs.dm"