Tae-clown-do v1

code/modules/spells/spell_types/aimed.dm

@@ -74,6 +74,8 @@
 
 /obj/effect/proc_holder/spell/aimed/proc/fire_projectile(mob/living/user, atom/target)
 	current_amount--
+	if(!projectile_type)
+		return
 	for(var/i in 1 to projectiles_per_fire)
 		var/obj/item/projectile/P = new projectile_type(user.loc)
 		P.firer = user

code/modules/spells/spell_types/godhand.dm

@@ -94,3 +94,86 @@
 	M.Stun(40)
 	M.petrify()
 	return ..()
+
+
+/obj/item/melee/touch_attack/megahonk
+	name = "\improper honkmother's blessing"
+	desc = "You've got a feeling they won't be laughing after this one. Honk honk."
+	catchphrase = "HONKDOOOOUKEN!"
+	on_use_sound = 'sound/items/airhorn.ogg'
+	icon = 'icons/mecha/mecha_equipment.dmi'
+	icon_state = "mecha_honker"
+
+/obj/item/melee/touch_attack/megahonk/afterattack(atom/target, mob/user, proximity)
+	if(!iscarbon(target))
+		return
+
+	user.say(catchphrase, forced = "spell")
+	playsound(get_turf(target), on_use_sound,100,1)
+	for(var/mob/living/carbon/M in (hearers(1, target) - user)) //3x3 around the target, not affecting the user
+		if(ishuman(M))
+			var/mob/living/carbon/human/H = M
+			if(istype(H.ears, /obj/item/clothing/ears/earmuffs))
+				continue
+		var/mul = (M==target ? 1 : 0.5)
+		to_chat(M, "<font color='red' size='7'>HONK</font>")
+		M.SetSleeping(0)
+		M.stuttering += 20*mul
+		M.adjustEarDamage(0, 30*mul)
+		M.Knockdown(60*mul)
+		if(prob(30))
+			M.Stun(200*mul)
+			M.Unconscious(80*mul)
+		else
+			M.Jitter(500*mul)
+
+	charges--
+	if(charges <= 0)
+		qdel(src)
+
+/obj/item/melee/touch_attack/megahonk/attack_self(mob/user)
+	. = ..()
+	to_chat(user, "<span class='notice'>\The [src] disappears, to honk another day.</span>")
+	qdel(src)
+
+/obj/item/melee/touch_attack/bspie
+	name = "\improper bluespace pie"
+	desc = "A thing you can barely comprehend as you hold it in your hand. You're fairly sure you could fit an entire body inside."
+	on_use_sound = 'sound/magic/demon_consume.ogg'
+	icon = 'icons/obj/food/piecake.dmi'
+	icon_state = "frostypie"
+	color = "#000077"
+
+/obj/item/melee/touch_attack/bspie/attack_self(mob/user)
+	. = ..()
+	to_chat(user, "<span class='notice'>You smear \the [src] on your chest! </span>")
+	qdel(src)
+
+/obj/item/melee/touch_attack/bspie/afterattack(atom/target, mob/user, proximity)
+	if(target == user)
+		to_chat(user, "<span class='notice'>You smear \the [src] on your chest!</span>")
+		qdel(src)
+		return
+	if(!iscarbon(target))
+		return
+	var/mob/living/carbon/M = target
+	var/obj/item/bodypart/head = M.get_bodypart("head")
+
+	user.visible_message("<span class='warning'>[user] is trying to stuff [M]\s body into \the [src]!</span>")
+	if(do_mob(user, M, 250))
+		var/name = M.real_name
+		var/obj/item/reagent_containers/food/snacks/pie/cream/pie = new(get_turf(M))
+		pie.name = "\improper [name] [pie.name]"
+
+		playsound(get_turf(target), on_use_sound, 50, 1)
+
+		if(head)
+			head.drop_limb()
+		head.throw_at(get_turf(head), 1, 1, user)
+		qdel(M)
+
+
+		charges--
+
+	if(charges <= 0)
+		qdel(src)

code/modules/uplink/uplink_items.dm

@@ -837,6 +837,13 @@ GLOBAL_LIST_INIT(uplink_items, subtypesof(/datum/uplink_item))
 	surplus = 0
 	include_modes = list(/datum/game_mode/nuclear/clown_ops)
 
+datum/uplink_item/stealthy_tools/taeclowndo_shoes
+	name = "Tae-clown-do Shoes"
+	desc = "A pair of shoes for the most elite agents of the honkmotherland. They grant the mastery of taeclowndo as long as they're worn."
+	cost = 12
+	item = /obj/item/clothing/shoes/clown_shoes/taeclowndo
+	include_modes = list(/datum/game_mode/nuclear/clown_ops)
+
 /datum/uplink_item/stealthy_tools/frame
 	name = "F.R.A.M.E. PDA Cartridge"
 	desc = "When inserted into a personal digital assistant, this cartridge gives you five PDA viruses which \
@@ -1382,6 +1389,13 @@ GLOBAL_LIST_INIT(uplink_items, subtypesof(/datum/uplink_item))
 	item = /obj/item/dnainjector/clumsymut
 	restricted_roles = list("Clown")
 
+/datum/uplink_item/role_restricted/taeclowndo_shoes
+	name = "Tae-clown-do Shoes"
+	desc = "A pair of shoes for the most elite agents of the honkmotherland. They grant the mastery of taeclowndo as long as they're worn."
+	cost = 16
+	item = /obj/item/clothing/shoes/clown_shoes/taeclowndo
+	restricted_roles = list("Clown")
+
 /datum/uplink_item/role_restricted/mimery
 	name = "Guide to Advanced Mimery Series"
 	desc = "The classical two part series on how to further hone your mime skills. Upon studying the series, the user should be able to make 3x1 invisible walls, and shoot bullets out of their fingers. Obviously only works for Mimes."