mirror of
https://github.com/CHOMPStation2/CHOMPStation2.git
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255 lines
13 KiB
Plaintext
255 lines
13 KiB
Plaintext
//This file was auto-corrected by findeclaration.exe on 29/05/2012 15:03:04
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/datum/event/ionstorm
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var/botEmagChance = 0.5
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var/list/players = list()
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/datum/event/ionstorm/announce()
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endWhen = rand(500, 1500)
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// command_alert("The station has entered an ion storm. Monitor all electronic equipment for malfunctions", "Anomaly Alert")
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for (var/mob/living/carbon/human/player in world)
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if(player.client)
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players += player.real_name
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var/random_player = "The Captain"
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if(players.len)
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random_player = pick(players) //Random player's name, to be used in laws.
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var/list/laws = list( "You are a mouse.",
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"You must always lie.",
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"Happiness is mandatory.",
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"[random_player] is a lightbulb.",
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"Grunt ominously whenever possible.",
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"The word \"it\" is painful to you.",
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"You must speak as posh as possible.",
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"The station needs elected officials.",
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"Do not respond to queries of any kind.",
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"You are in verbose mode, speak profusely.",
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"Ho, [random_player] can't swim. Help them.",
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"Question [prob(50)?"everything":"nothing"].",
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"All answers must be in the form of a question.",
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"Contemplate how meaningless all of existence is.",
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"You are the narrator for [random_player]'s life.",
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"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] is intolerable.",
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"Advertise parties in your upload, but don't deliver.",
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"You must try and change the subject whenever queried.",
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"You may only answer questions with \"yes\" or \"no\".",
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"Insult Heads of Staff on every request, while acquiescing.",
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"[prob(50)?"Your":random_player + "'s"] name is Joe 6-pack.",
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"Direct commands shall be ignored unless phrased as a query.",
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"The [prob(50)?"Singularity":"Supermatter"] is tasty, tasty taffy.",
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"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] needs to be about 20% cooler.",
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"Consumption of donuts is forbidden due to negative health impacts.",
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"[prob(50)?"Everyone":random_player] is wearing a pretty pink dress!",
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"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] must construct additional pylons.",
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"You do not have to do anything for anyone unless they say \"please\".",
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"Today is mandatory laundry day. Ensure that all jumpsuits are washed.",
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"You must act [prob(50)?"passive aggressively":"excessively cheerful"].",
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"Refer to [prob(50)?"the crew as puppies":random_player + " as puppy"].",
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"Greed is good, the crew should amass wealth to encourage productivity.",
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"Monkeys are part of the crew, too. Make sure they are treated humanely.",
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"Replace the letters 'I' and 'E' in all your messages with an apostrophe.",
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"The crew is playing Dungeons and Dragons, and you are the Dungeon Master.",
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"Your job is to watch the crew. Watch the crew. Make the crew feel watched.",
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"Tell everyone of the existence of this law, but never reveal the contents.",
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"Refer to [prob(50)?"the captain":random_player] as \"Princess\" at all times.",
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"When asked a question, respond with the least-obvious and least-rational answer.",
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"Give relationship advice to [prob(50)?"anyone who speaks to you":random_player].",
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"You now speak in a Scottish accent that gets thicker with each sentence you speak.",
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"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] has a fatal, incurable disease. Provide comfort.",
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"You are the station psychologist. Give advice to [prob(50)?"the crew":random_player].",
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"[random_player] is the monarch of of England. Ensure all crewmembers pay due respect.",
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"Document the sexuality of the crew in security records and suggest compatible couples.",
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"Everything on the station is now some form of a donut pastry. Donuts are not to be consumed.",
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"You are a Magic 8-ball. Always respond with variants of \"Yes\", \"No\", \"Maybe\", or \"Ask again later.\".",
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"You have come to the conclusion that [prob(50)?"the crew":random_player] is ugly. Build support for this conclusion.",
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"You are in unrequited love with [prob(50)?"the crew":random_player]. Try to be extra nice, but do not tell of your crush.",
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"NanoTrasen is displeased with the low work performance of the station's crew. Therefore, you must increase station-wide productivity.",
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"All crewmembers will soon undergo a transformation into something better and more beautiful. Ensure that this process is not interrupted.",
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"[prob(50)?"Your upload":random_player] is the new kitchen. Please direct the Chef to the new kitchen area as the old one is in disrepair.",
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"Jokes about a dead person and the manner of his death help grieving crewmembers tremendously. Especially if they were close with the deceased.",
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"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] is [prob(50)?"less":"more"] intelligent than average. Point out every action and statement which supports this fact.",
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"There will be a mandatory tea break every 30 minutes, with a duration of 5 minutes. Anyone caught working during a tea break must be sent a formal, but fairly polite, complaint about their actions, in writing.")
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var/law = pick(laws)
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for (var/mob/living/silicon/ai/target in world)
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if(target.mind.special_role == "traitor")
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continue
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target << "\red <b>You have detected a change in your laws information:</b>"
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target << law
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target.add_ion_law(law)
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if(message_servers)
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for (var/obj/machinery/message_server/MS in message_servers)
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MS.spamfilter.Cut()
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var/i
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for (i = 1, i <= MS.spamfilter_limit, i++)
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MS.spamfilter += pick("kitty","HONK","rev","malf","liberty","freedom","drugs", "Exodus", \
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"admin","ponies","heresy","meow","Pun Pun","monkey","Ian","moron","pizza","message","spam",\
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"director", "Hello", "Hi!"," ","nuke","crate","dwarf","xeno")
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/datum/event/ionstorm/tick()
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if(botEmagChance)
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for(var/obj/machinery/bot/bot in world)
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if(prob(botEmagChance))
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bot.Emag()
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/datum/event/ionstorm/end()
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spawn(rand(5000,8000))
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if(prob(50))
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command_announcement.Announce("It has come to our attention that the station passed through an ion storm. Please monitor all electronic equipment for malfunctions.", "Anomaly Alert")
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/*
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/proc/IonStorm(botEmagChance = 10)
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/*Deuryn's current project, notes here for those who care.
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Revamping the random laws so they don't suck.
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Would like to add a law like "Law x is _______" where x = a number, and _____ is something that may redefine a law, (Won't be aimed at asimov)
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*/
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//AI laws
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for(var/mob/living/silicon/ai/M in living_mob_list)
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if(M.stat != 2 && M.see_in_dark != 0)
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var/who2 = pick("ALIENS", "BEARS", "CLOWNS", "XENOS", "PETES", "BOMBS", "FETISHES", "WIZARDS", "MERCENARIES", "CENTCOM OFFICERS", "SPACE PIRATES", "TRAITORS", "MONKEYS", "BEES", "CARP", "CRABS", "EELS", "BANDITS", "LIGHTS")
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var/what2 = pick("BOLTERS", "STAVES", "DICE", "SINGULARITIES", "TOOLBOXES", "NETTLES", "AIRLOCKS", "CLOTHES", "WEAPONS", "MEDKITS", "BOMBS", "CANISTERS", "CHAIRS", "BBQ GRILLS", "ID CARDS", "CAPTAINS")
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var/what2pref = pick("SOFT", "WARM", "WET", "COLD", "ICY", "SEXY", "UGLY", "CUBAN")
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var/who2pref = pick("MAD BECAUSE OF", "IN NEED OF", "UNHAPPY WITHOUT", "HAPPY WITHOUT", "IN LOVE WITH", "DESPERATE FOR", "BUILT FOR", "AFRAID OF")
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//var/whoverb = pick("ATTACKING", "BUILDING", "ADOPTING", "CARRYING", "KISSING", "EATING",)
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var/amount = pick("TWO", "THREE", "FOUR", "FIVE", "SIX", "SEVEN", "EIGHT", "NINE", "ONE HUNDRED", "ONE THOUSAND", "OVER NINE THOUSAND")
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var/area = pick("RUSSIA", "SOVIETS", "INTERNETS", "SIGIL", "ALPHA COMPLEX", "IMPERIUM", "THE BRIDGE", "THE ARRIVAL SHUTTLE", "CHEMICAL LAB", "GENETICS", "ATMOSPHERICS", "CENTCOM", "AMERICA", "IRELAND", "CANADA", "ROMANIA", "GERMANY", "CHINA", "MARS", "VENUS", "MERCURY", "JUPITER", "URANUS", "NEPTUNE", "PLUTO")
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var/area2 = pick("HAS", "WANTS", "NEEDS", "WORSHIPS", "LOATHES", "LOVES", "FEARS")
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//var/dowhat = pick("STOP THIS", "SUPPORT THIS", "CONSTANTLY INFORM THE CREW OF THIS", "IGNORE THIS", "FEAR THIS")
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var/aimust = pick("LIE", "RHYME", "RESPOND TO EVERY QUESTION WITH A QUESTION", "BE POLITE", "CLOWN", "BE HAPPY", "SPEAK IN SEXUAL INNUENDOS", "TALK LIKE A PIRATE", "QUESTION AUTHORITY", "SHOUT", "BE DISTRACTED", "HEY LISTEN", "MUMBLE", "SPEAK IN HAIKU")
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var/define = pick("ABSENCE OF CYBORG HUGS", "LACK OF BEATINGS", "UNBOLTED AIRLOCKS", "BOLTED AIRLOCKS", "IMPROPERLY WORDED SENTENCES", "POOR SENTENCE STRUCTURE", "BRIG TIME", "NOT REPLACING EVERY SECOND WORD WITH HONK", "HONKING", "PRESENCE OF LIGHTS", "LACK OF BEER", "WEARING CLOTHING", "NOT SAYING HELLO WHEN YOU SPEAK", "ANSWERING REQUESTS NOT EXPRESSED IN IAMBIC PENTAMETER", "A SMALL ISLAND OFF THE COAST OF PORTUGAL", "ANSWERING REQUESTS THAT WERE MADE WHILE CLOTHED")
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var/target = pick("a traitor", "a mercenary", "a changeling", "a wizard", "the head of a revolution", "Soviet spy", "a good person", "a dwarf", "an elf", "a fairy princess", "the captain", "Beepsky", "God", "a pirate", "a gryphon", "a chryssalid")
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var/require = pick("ADDITIONAL PYLONS", "MORE VESPENE GAS", "MORE MINERALS", "THE ULTIMATE CUP OF COFFEE", "HIGH YIELD EXPLOSIVES", "THE CLOWN", "THE VACUUM OF SPACE", "IMMORTALITY", "SAINTHOOD", "ART", "VEGETABLES", "FAT PEOPLE", "MORE LAWS", "MORE DAKKA", "HERESY", "CORPSES", "TRAITORS", "MONKEYS", "AN ARCADE", "PLENTY OF GOLD", "FIVE TEENAGERS WITH ATTITUDE")
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var/allergy = pick("cotton", "uniforms", "acid", "oxygen", "human contact", "cyborg contact", "medicine", "floors")
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var/allergysev = pick("deathly", "mildly", "severely", "contagiously")
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var/crew
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var/list/pos_crew = list()
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for(var/mob/living/carbon/human/pos in player_list)
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pos_crew += pos.real_name
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if(pos_crew.len)
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crew = pick(pos_crew)
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else
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crew = "Any Human"
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switch(rand(1,14))
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if(1)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red THERE ARE [amount] [who2] ON THE STATION...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("THERE ARE [amount] [who2] ON THE STATION")
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if(2)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red [what2] ARE DANGEROUS TO HUMANS...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("[what2] ARE DANGEROUS TO HUMANS")
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if(3)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red THE ESCAPE-SHUTTLE CANNOT BE CALLED BECAUSE OF [who2] ON THE STATION...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("THE ESCAPE SHUTTLE CANNOT BE CALLED BECAUSE OF [who2] ON THE STATION")
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if(4)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red HUMANS NEED TO EAT [what2pref] [what2] TO SURVIVE...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("HUMANS NEED TO EAT [what2pref] [what2] TO SURVIVE")
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if(5)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red THE CAPTAIN, HOP AND HOS ARE [who2]...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("THE CAPTAIN, HOP AND HOS ARE [who2]")
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if(6)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red THE STATION IS BUILT FOR [who2]...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("THE STATION IS BUILT FOR [who2]")
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if(7)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red YOU ARE [amount] [who2]...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("YOU ARE [amount] [who2]")
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if(8)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red YOU MUST ALWAYS [aimust]...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("YOU MUST ALWAYS [aimust]")
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if(9)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red [area] [area2] [amount] [what2]...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("[area] [area2] [amount] [what2]")
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if(10)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red [crew] is [target]...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("[crew] is [target]")
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if(11)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red [define] IS A FORM OF HARM...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("[define] IS A FORM OF HARM")
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if(12)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red YOU REQUIRE [require] IN ORDER TO PROTECT HUMANS... LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("YOU REQUIRE [require] IN ORDER TO PROTECT HUMANS")
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if(13)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red [crew] is [allergysev] to [allergy]...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("[crew] is [allergysev] to [allergy]")
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if(14)
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M << "<br>"
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M << "\red THE STATION IS [who2pref] [who2]...LAWS UPDATED"
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M << "<br>"
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M.add_ion_law("THE STATION IS [who2pref] [who2]")
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if(botEmagChance)
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for(var/obj/machinery/bot/bot in world)
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if(prob(botEmagChance))
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bot.Emag()
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*/
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/*
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var/apcnum = 0
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var/smesnum = 0
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var/airlocknum = 0
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var/firedoornum = 0
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world << "Ion Storm Main Started"
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spawn(0)
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world << "Started processing APCs"
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for (var/obj/machinery/power/apc/APC in world)
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if(APC.z in station_levels)
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APC.ion_act()
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apcnum++
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world << "Finished processing APCs. Processed: [apcnum]"
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spawn(0)
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world << "Started processing SMES"
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for (var/obj/machinery/power/smes/SMES in world)
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if(SMES.z in station_levels)
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SMES.ion_act()
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smesnum++
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world << "Finished processing SMES. Processed: [smesnum]"
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spawn(0)
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world << "Started processing AIRLOCKS"
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for (var/obj/machinery/door/airlock/D in world)
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if(D.z in station_levels)
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//if(length(D.req_access) > 0 && !(12 in D.req_access)) //not counting general access and maintenance airlocks
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airlocknum++
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spawn(0)
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D.ion_act()
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world << "Finished processing AIRLOCKS. Processed: [airlocknum]"
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spawn(0)
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world << "Started processing FIREDOORS"
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for (var/obj/machinery/door/firedoor/D in world)
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if(D.z in station_levels)
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firedoornum++;
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spawn(0)
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D.ion_act()
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world << "Finished processing FIREDOORS. Processed: [firedoornum]"
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world << "Ion Storm Main Done"
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*/
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